Celebrating Ben David!

"For the LORD is good

and his love endures forever;

his faithfulness continues

through all generations."

Psalm 100:5

Four years ago today at 11:20am we welcomed Ben David into this world!!

He weighed 3 lbs. 10.9oz and measured 14.5 inches

He was perfect in every way.

what an amazing gift he has and continues to be to us...gentle, kind, sensitive, thoughtful, creative and loving. when i think back on this day 4 years ago, i am flooded with emotions. most of you if not all have heard the story, but i think it bears repeating every year, as i believe it is a true testimony to the goodness and faithfulness of our God.

for truly, ben david was a gift from the lord.

my pregnancy with Ben David was completely normal, so Ben and i were both shocked when my water unexpectedly broke at 29 weeks. within a matter of hours i was admitted to CMC and was informed i would be on bed rest until the birth of our son. doctors were explaining to me the complications my son might have, the problems with lung development, etc. within a few short hours, my life had ben turned upside down. this was not what we had planned for...this was not the way it was suppose to be. we were overwhelmed, afraid and uncertain.

we have all come to place like this in our lives when we are suddenly and abruptly reminded that we are completely out of control. in times like this, it would seem we have two choices:

1) live in fear of the unknown 2) trust the lord of the unknown.

while we did trust him, it was still hard. those days on bed rest were some of the most difficult of my life. each day was essential and invaluable for the development of our son, but each day i lay in a bed, unable to get up for more than a few minutes at a time, constantly fighting the urge to give in to my own thoughts of fear and anxiety.

no one, not even the "experts" had answers, no one had certainty, no one could give me any absolutes. no human was able to give me what i needed. in those days, i learned many things. one of the most important was this. life often does not go as we expect it will. our plans are often interrupted by things we do not understand, and if we look to the world for answers during these times...we will be disappointed. every time.

it is so easy to think we are in control of our lives until something like this happens. the truth is, we are not in control of our lives. not today, not tomorrow, not yesterday...never.

and the sooner we can understand and embrace this, the quicker we will know the true peace that comes from trusting the "lord of the unknown."

it was a constant battle for me in those days, but yet...there was a constant undercurrent of peace. the lord was in control, he could handle what i could not.

after 2 long, but very needful weeks...we meet our firstborn son...benjamin david wright II. named after his father...it was the name i always wanted to use. it took 48 hours to convince his daddy:) but i think we agree it fits perfectly:)

the days and weeks that followed were not easy. ben david stayed a month in the hospital and i cried every night i had to leave him there. it was a process of him gaining weight, learning to breath and learning to eat on his own.

he was our firstborn and i wanted nothing more than to take him home and care for him. but the lord was faithful. on april 23rd we brought ben david home with us!

my hope is that wherever this blog entry finds you today...you might be encouraged. while we cannot control our lives today anymore than we could yesterday, we can rest in the One who promises to be with us and never leave us. to give us the peace that passes all understanding. to walk with us through the "waters and the fires" of this life.

may each of us choose to trust the lord of the unknown,

for he is good, and his love endures forever, and his faithfulness continues to all generations!!

happy 4th birthday ben david...we love you! you are a continual reminder to us of the lord's faithfulness!